Unhinged and Underpaid
Minimum Wage, Maximum Rage — Dual-Size Can Cooler
$5.00
The only thing that should be chilled is your drink.
When you've spent eight hours at a job that pays just enough to keep you coming back but not enough to keep you happy, you need a drink. And that drink needs to stay cold while you process your maximum rage. This dual-sided can cooler is your new best friend for post-shift recovery or weekend survival.
The Boring Specs (for the thirsty):
High-Grade Neoprene: Waterproof and rugged, just like your resolve to eventually quit.
Dual-Size Options: Available in Regular (5″ × 4″) for your standard emotional support beverages, or Slim (6.5″ × 3.2″) for those fancy hard seltzers you drink to feel something.
Thermal Protection: Keeps your drinks ice-cold and your hands warm, even when your heart is cold from corporate indifference.
Ribbed Seams: Built to last longer than your patience during a Monday morning meeting.
Easy Care: Spot clean as needed—because we know you're too tired for actual laundry.
Disclaimer: Does not include the beverage. You have to buy that with your minimum wage.
When you've spent eight hours at a job that pays just enough to keep you coming back but not enough to keep you happy, you need a drink. And that drink needs to stay cold while you process your maximum rage. This dual-sided can cooler is your new best friend for post-shift recovery or weekend survival.
The Boring Specs (for the thirsty):
High-Grade Neoprene: Waterproof and rugged, just like your resolve to eventually quit.
Dual-Size Options: Available in Regular (5″ × 4″) for your standard emotional support beverages, or Slim (6.5″ × 3.2″) for those fancy hard seltzers you drink to feel something.
Thermal Protection: Keeps your drinks ice-cold and your hands warm, even when your heart is cold from corporate indifference.
Ribbed Seams: Built to last longer than your patience during a Monday morning meeting.
Easy Care: Spot clean as needed—because we know you're too tired for actual laundry.
Disclaimer: Does not include the beverage. You have to buy that with your minimum wage.
What You're Getting Into
- Premium unisex t-shirt, 100% ring-spun cotton
- Printed with love (and a hint of spite)
- Ships in 5–7 business days via print-on-demand
- Unisex sizing — size up for that oversized vibe
- Machine washable (unlike your problems)
